SCHOOLZ // Safety Harbor Elementary
Dear Diary....
It’s been dark and lonely sitting here in this bag. I guess I’m waiting for the next person who’s supposed to be taking me home. I hope this person is good to me or else it’s going to be a very long weekend. I think I know who is taking me home, I keep hearing this name Mr. Yocum. I was right, it was Mr. Yocum. Mr. Yocum carried me out of the class in the dark bag that I was in. He kept on swinging it in circles This was kind of fun, it was like a roller coaster. I heard the door of his vehicle open and he threw me in. I hit the window and then landed on the seat. “My goodness, what a nice guy.” After that he pulled me out of the bag. I said “ahhhhh”, what is this crazy looking person. He’s got funny looking hair that goes all over the place. After the initial shock I began to relax a little bit. After that Mr. Yocum turned on the radio and this funny song came on. The song kept on saying you’re a jerk, you’re a jerk, you’re a jerk, jerk, jerk, jerk. I thought to myself wow, this person is famous for making a song about being a jerk. I should make a song saying that “you’re a dirt ball, you’re a dirt ball, and you’re a dirt ball.”
As we were driving along Mr. Yocum turned into a store. Oh boy! This place smelled so good. I believe they call this place kentuck Fried chicken. He drove up to the window and asked for three pieces of chicken and something to drink called. Mt. Dew. He sucked the meat right down to the bone. He didn’t give me any of it, all I got was some of the crumbs that he dropped. When we got to the house I just about had a heart attack. I heard two dogs barking, that’s bad news for a dirtball like me. Mr Yocum held me in his arms like a baby and protected me from those dogs. I got really excited when I looked in the back yard and saw the pool. I thought yes maybe someone will drop me in the pool and I can get a good bath. I thought wrong, instead they threw me in the garage, another dark place. While in the garage I kept hearing some Mya girl keep saying “daddy take us out to play with the dirt ball”. We went outside and Mr. Yocum thought he wad cool and kept on spinning me on his finger. I kept on getting dizzier and dizzier and finally Mya said lets play four square. The Locums were not the best four square players, especially that Tia and Bylee girl. After that four square was getting boring so Mr. Yocum kept on kicking me in the air as hard has he could. Mya, Tia and Bylee kept on saying higher higher, and I was saying “no, no, no”. We finally we inside, I thought I might get to sleep in one of the rooms, maybe on the bed and be cozy and warm. I couldn’t believe it, that Mr. Yocum threw me out into the garage. While in the garage I started to make up a song for Mr. Yocum, he’s a jerk, jerk jerk. I was so mad, the weekend was cold and the Youcums don’t play outside when it’ cold. So basically spend the whole weekend in the garage. I totally felt neglected. But who cares about a dirtball.
Harry Yocum (5th grade intern teacher)
Tea
Dear Diary:
The thing that took me home on Jan. 25, 2010 was Tea. She was so cool. Her sister picked me up and said “500”. I have bruises. Who would do that? I guess she would.
I had black-stuff all over me. It was like someone threw me into some dirt. I looked like the Loch ness monster or Big Foot. They had sweat on them and I had dirt on me.
Amber
Dear Diary:
After the bell rang Amber bounced me home. When we got home Amber and her brother Drake kicked me down the alley and Drake kicked me over Amanda’s fence (a neighbor) That’s not all, Amanda’s dogs Annie and Abbey were outside, those are evil little, mean doggies. Drake hopped over the fence before they could get to me. When he threw me over the fence I landed in the back of a pick-up truck and my face hurt so bad Drake apologized and we went inside. The next morning Amber bounced me back to school.
Mikey
Dear Diary;
I went home today with this really cool kid today, Mikey. When I got a good look at him I said he looks like a monster. When it was time to leave I saw him put this really funny looking greenish yellow belt on. He waited right next to this bent pole. So he set me down and I said “what a relief, I thought he was going to bounce me” After he set me down he put me in this really cramped space. I thought I was going to pop !
Joey
Dear Diary:
Today Joey’s taking me home. First Joey kept kicking me over and over again and then he took me inside and I saw big dogs. One was very nice to me. When Joey’s brother got home they took me outside and kicked me next door and I met a princess ball who was like me. Joey picked me up and started playing dodge ball with me and Finley. Their mom said it was time for dinner and she said to leave the ball outside. The next day Joey took me back to school.
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